Every time a girl says things like,
‘I don’t have female friends...too much drama…all my friends are guys...’
That, for me, is an instant turn off, red flag if you like. The Sisterhood should in fact be wary of such a female.
It all came back a while ago as I was condoling a lady who had just lost her mum. She mentioned how her boss had given her time off since the mum got sick (about a week or so to her death, to now planning the funeral…it would all add up to 3 weeks paid leave, and did I mention that she works in a phone accessories and MPesa shop?)
I mentioned how lucky she was to have such a good boss and you know what she said?
It’s because he’s a man. No woman would be that understanding.
'Wamama ni visirani na hupenda kujiona kama wako better off kukuliko. Siwezi fanyia mwanamke mwenzangu job.’
She went on to point out that I was the first ‘real’ female friend she ever had had and bla bla bla…all along I had tuned off and vowed not to let her self hate cross over to this side.
So, it got me thinking, why is it that, normally, women of a lesser intellect to be precise, tend to have so much negativity and mistrust over their gender? Kenya being an overly misogynist society, why on earth would you be okay crossing over to that side where none of them gives a hoot but instead, looks down on you?
Back in the day, I was very good in Math. The Math’s teacher even used to call me The Great Mathematician. So this girl comes over asking that I help her solve a Math’s problem and I did…explained it all to her and she got it. I’m a pretty decent teacher. But you know what, the minute she walks off she goes over to a boy and asks him to help her solve the same problem. She supposedly needed a boy to second my formula to believe it true.
Years later, some young lady hopped in a matatu I was in and I hear her ask the makanga if the bus would pass by Racecourse. He said Yes. I tap her on the shoulder and tell her she’s being lied to, told her the right matatu she should travel in which uses that route because the one we were in was plying a different route, and she’ll have to take a bodaboda or another matatu after alighting in order to get there. She asks the makanga, ‘Si umesema utaniweka Racecourse’ of which he affirms. It’s already past seven and darkness has started streaming in when she alights near Karen and is given a 10bob coin to take a matatu to Racecourse. Ushawahi skia stage ya 10 bob?
Then, the other day, I was spiraling through a car park hoping to find a spot at this Nairobi’s cheapest, somewhat safe and poorly illuminated private park when at a corner I almost bump into an exiting lady’s Toyota Vitz. I politely ask her to turn on her headlights so other motorists see her and I guess I saw her roll her eyes. Minutes later as I’m exiting by the stairs I find this huge snarl-up from the 3rd all the way to the ground floor. She had rammed into someone’s car!
So, maybe you can tell me, cos’ I don’t get it, where does this backward thinking come from…that you cannot listen, hear, acknowledge, respect or uphold any advice you get from a fellow woman?
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